Throw It Like a Ballplayer

providing baseball commentary and ponderings since April 2010

It’s Safe To Say It’s Over

Posted by dannmckeegan on June 4, 2010

With the Astros’ win over the Cubs on Friday night, the Cubs fell 6 games below .500 at 24-30.  They trail St. Louis and Cincinnati by 7.5 and 6.5 games, respectively.  Meanwhile, they only have 1.5, 2.5, and 3.5-game leads over Pittsburgh, Milwaukee, and Houston.   There are towels to throw in, “no mas”es to be verbalized between rounds, and curses to be muttered as we turn off the TVs after the 7th frustrating inning of each and every game.

I’d hope that the Cubs would send Aramis Ramirez to a specialist one last time, just to be sure he’s okay.  I’ll accept the thumb and shoulder being fine.  In fact, I’m okay with leaving medicine and biology behind.  It’s time to move on to physics.  Specifically, we need a physicist who specializes in black holes.  That is what Ramirez has become.  Not even light comes out of his at bats and fielding, and there must be an event horizon just following him around.  Jokes were made before the season about Carlos Silva’s gravity-possessing belly and rear.  But Ramirez may well be a true freak of the physical universe.

Matter is pulled in and crushed, as entropy increases and Hawking radiation is possibly emitted.  To think, scientists have spent millions of dollars and hours researching, calculating, modeling and searching for these mysterious structures.  All they had to do was trade in the Hubbel for cheap binoculars and an upper-deck ticket.

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